Tag: Funny
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Dangerous Road Tricks & Bad Decisions
Growing up in Indiana was fun. But the hardest thing to do before we were old enough, was how to secure beer for the upcoming Friday night. Fortunately, we were quite clever and adaptive. There was always a new scheme waiting to be tested. Here’s a few short stories involving cars and beer. Road Trick…
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The Whittaker 2000 Video Game
We have had a few garage sales over the years. I remember once selling some of my albums and somehow my copy of Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band (picture disc nonetheless) got in the mix and was gone before I knew it. When we were preparing to sell our house in Crystal Lake, we…
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Polly Want a Crack?
I have always been a hard worker. I learned it from my father. The work gets done and then the body rests. So, this story begins like many of mine, on the river, our river days. But there is no river in this story. This is about work. Sure, I had a full-time job, so…
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Throwing A Baby
In the Autumn of 2021 I lost my little brother. He died way too early. News of his death shocked and stunned close friends and family. We decided that it would be a more fitting setting for a “Celebration of Life” ceremony in December to be held in an Irish Pub. Charlie would have liked…
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Water Closet Trouble in France
When one travels to Europe for the first time, one learns many new traveling tips including the most important of all. “Where is the restroom?” For those new to Eupropa, restroom facilities in general are known as “Water Closets” Once understood, suddenly, the ubiquitous “WC” sign seems to appear everywhere. Restrooms are important and knowing…
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The Day I Learned to Hate Pâté
Warning: this story contains smoking, strong language and sophomoric potty humor. I snuffed my half-smoked cigarette out in the ashtray and released my seatbelt. I was at work. It was a Saturday so that meant my weekend job. You see I was going to college and working full time, so it only made sense to…
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“Thou Art My Savior” and Other Fine Quotes From Starving Cats
My wife, Carrie and I nuzzled into a cozy small one bedroom apartment on the third floor of a courtyard-building on the upper northside of Chicago, known as East Rogers Park. We lived there for a couple of years back in the early 1990’s. I worked in the city and my train stop was on…
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Two Weeks Does Not a Marriage Make
I am lucky. I’m lucky for many reasons. One, I met my wife, Carrie, at a young age and have been enjoying a lifetime of wonderful memories. Another reason I am lucky is because I won a Caribbean cruise on a Chicago radio station. On February 14 (St. Valentine’s Day), 1983 I picked up the…
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The Wrong Prescription for the Carribbean
Most people know about the Bahamas, but fewer have heard of the Abaco Islands, a small archipelago just north of the main land. One December many years ago, my wife, Carrie and I visited these islands. Our dear friends were retired and living there on a sixty foot Sea Ray yacht. They invited us to…
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Chopsticks 101
It’s 2008 and once again I’m in hot pursuit of a new life-changing event. I remember as a child, I couldn’t understand why my grandmother Millie couldn’t just stay put. It seems she was moving to a new house every couple of years. But like I said, it was 2008 and I was a full-grown…
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The Guy Who Gets to Name Fonts
Corsiva, Albertus, Estrangelo-Edessa, Garamond, Kartika, Marlett, Tahoma and Verdana… I want to meet the guy that gets to name fonts. I wonder what his list of rejected font names might look like… There are two different categories of fonts: Serif and San Serif which are easily detectable by their type face. Serif fonts have lots…
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Root Beer and Bananas
Root Beer and Bananas, bad combination? You bet! Unless you are already an unfortunate victim of this combination like myself, then take heed to this important message! Root beer and bananas should never be eaten at the same time without ice cream. If you want to partake in this delicacy be forewarned. This ice cream shop faire must be…