Recently Released…

  • Elton John on a Full Bladder

    Elton John on a Full Bladder

    If you are like me, you like a story with a happy ending. This isn’t one of those. It was the summer of 1989 (August 26 to be exact) and Elton John was touring the country. He made a stop in Hoffman Estates, Illinois at the Popular Creek venue which was a grand outdoor theater…

  • Two Weeks Does Not a Marriage Make

    Two Weeks Does Not a Marriage Make

    I am lucky. I’m lucky for many reasons. One, I met my wife, Carrie, at a young age and have been enjoying a lifetime of wonderful memories. Another reason I am lucky is because I won a Caribbean cruise on a Chicago radio station. On February 14 (St. Valentine’s Day), 1983 I picked up the…

  • Taking a Dog Down the River

    Taking a Dog Down the River

    If you have been following my posts, you know that I have written a few stories about our life on the river. Well, here’s another one. We lived on the Chain-O-Lakes on the Fox River just north of the McHenry dam in northern Illinois. Our street was separate from most of the river-front homes in…

  • Never Take a Shotgun into a Bathroom

    Never Take a Shotgun into a Bathroom

    One of the most contentious topics these days center on guns. I’m not here to discuss the good or bad of guns. But I will share a little story with you if you are willing to indulge me for a few minutes. For my fourteenth Christmas I received a 12 gauge shotgun. I didn’t ask…

  • The Haunted Ladder

    The Haunted Ladder

    I always look forward to writing stories about my dad. He led such an interesting life. He was one of the most hardworking men I’ve ever met in my life. I remember growing up, he always had two to three jobs, just to make money to put food on the table. One Saturday morning when…

  • Life Inside a Dumbwaiter

    Life Inside a Dumbwaiter

    I have often said that I am an accumulation of everything I’ve wanted to be. And on this blog article topic, I may be one of the few experts worldwide. Life inside a dumbwaiter? How does one gain the mature wisdom and experience of becoming an expert on life inside a dumbwaiter? I’ll tell you.…

  • At the Rocky Horror Picture Show with an Egg

    At the Rocky Horror Picture Show with an Egg

    So, enter the cult-classic movie, “The Rocky Horror Picture Show”. Written by Richard O’Brien produced and released in 1975. Nobody seen that coming. Nobody could really explain it. It was just a moment in time, when planets aligned, the moon was blue, and everybody had to go to the theater and see Rocky Horror, again…

  • Twenty-Seven Bees Versus One Shirt

    Twenty-Seven Bees Versus One Shirt

    If you are squeamish about bee stings then this one is for you. I was a young boy living in a corner of a small town in northern Indiana. I led a farmstead lifestyle. I grew up with horses, ducks, and chickens; everything that you expect on in a picturesque agrarian life. Life passed slowly…

  • Cold & Naked

    Cold & Naked

    One cold, grey January day in 1997, I planned to paint the master bedroom at our house on the Chain-O-Lakes in northern Illinois. Our home at that time was a two story river house that had itself grown over the decades by way of several large construction projects. By the time we bought it, it…

  • The Wrong Prescription for the Carribbean

    The Wrong Prescription for the Carribbean

    Most people know about the Bahamas, but fewer have heard of the Abaco Islands, a small archipelago just north of the main land. One December many years ago, my wife, Carrie and I visited these islands. Our dear friends were retired and living there on a sixty foot Sea Ray yacht. They invited us to…

  • The Guy Who Gets to Name Fonts

    The Guy Who Gets to Name Fonts

    Michael Hemphill August  31, 2010 Corsiva, Albertus, Estrangelo-Edessa, Garamond, Kartika, Marlett, Tahoma and Verdana… I want to meet the guy that gets to name fonts.  I wonder what his list of rejected font names might look like… There are two different categories of fonts: Serif and San Serif which are easily detectable by their type…

  • Root Beer and Bananas

    Root Beer and Bananas

    Michael Hemphill August 30, 2010 Root Beer and Bananas, bad combination?  You bet!  Unless you are already an unfortunate victim of this combination like myself, then take heed to this important message! Root beer and bananas should never be eaten at the same time without ice cream.  If you want to partake in this delicacy be forewarned. …

  • Grandma and the Fireball

    Grandma and the Fireball

    December 22, 2011 In 1976, I was just 14 years old when our proud country was celebrating its 200th birthday.  As a tribute to the upcoming event, Ray and Mildred Thilmont decided to host a family gathering.  In 1976, they lived in Griffith, Indiana.  Millie, as most called her, was my grandmother.  And her house…

  • Chapstick and the Vacuum Cleaner

    Chapstick and the Vacuum Cleaner

    September 25, 2010 Have you ever tasted bad chap stick?  Most brands of chap stick or lip balm come in a variety of flavors, and for the most part, have a non-offensive taste.  So how could it be that I found myself wondering this very question one day back in 1994?  Let me think now…  it…

  • Autumn Comes Again

    Autumn Comes Again

    Excerpt from my runner’s diary: August 25, 2010 – Good run. Felt strong at the end. A leaf hit me on the way home. I like to try and find the FIRST hint of a new season.  I have often said that autumn in Chicago is the most predictable of all seasons found here.  So,…

  • A Horse for Christmas

    A Horse for Christmas

    September 1, 2010 I grew up on a farm in the Midwestern United States.  That’s not all together true, I mean, it was definitely about as Midwest as you can get, but it wasn’t really a farm.  We lived a farm-like life in some respects I guess.  We had plenty of farm animals and we…

  • Planets

    Planets

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “Planets”. Use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source.

  • Beware

    Beware

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “Beware of Pedestrians”. Use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source. .

  • Passive

    Passive

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “Passive”. Use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source.

  • We’ll Take The Ramp

    We’ll Take The Ramp

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “We’ll Take the Ramp”. Use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source. . Mike working out the bridge in “Don’t Hurry My Heart”.

  • Never Overstate an Underscore

    Never Overstate an Underscore

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “NOAU”. Use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source. Never Overstate An Underscore (NOAU) is now generally available for streaming, downloading and now you can purchase a CD. People ask me where I get…

  • 1251

    1251

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “1251”. Use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source.  Imagine every time your digital watch reached 12:51, you had access to a time portal, you had access to the year 1251. Imagine an adventure…

  • Escape the Martian Monkey War

    Escape the Martian Monkey War

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “Escape the Martian/Monkey War”. Here’s a great way to try before your buy. Please enjoy selected EMMW excerpts below. Then use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source. Escape the Martian Monkey War You…

  • Muldolf’s Inner World

    Muldolf’s Inner World

    Buy this on iTunes!Buy this on Amazon!Listen on YouTube!Listen on Spotify! Welcome to the music of “Muldolf’s Inner World” (MIW). Use the links above to purchase or listen from your favorite music source. The inspiration for Muldolf’s Inner World came during a wonderful time we spent at the Abacos Islands in the Bahamas. Surrounded by…

  • How to Subscribe to My Stories, Step by Step

    How to Subscribe to My Stories, Step by Step

    If you have decided that you want to enrich your life with my little stories on a regular basis but are not yet receiving the necessary email notifications when I post regularly, than this quick step-by-step tutorial is for you. I will start out by saying, it’s not your fault. Like you, I have many…

  • Learning to Water Ski & Other Lessons Learned Through Failure

    Learning to Water Ski & Other Lessons Learned Through Failure

    It was 1995 when my wife, Carrie and I bought a house on the Fox River. We didn’t know the first thing about boating so we signed up for Coast Guard Safety Training at the local community college. Thirteen Friday evenings later, we were certified and knew enough about boating to know it is damn…

  • “Thou Art My Savior” and Other Fine Quotes From Starving Cats

    “Thou Art My Savior” and Other Fine Quotes From Starving Cats

    My wife, Carrie and I nuzzled into a cozy small one bedroom apartment on the third floor of a courtyard-building on the upper northside of Chicago, known as East Rogers Park. We lived there for a couple of years back in the early 1990’s. I worked in the city and my train stop was on…